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巧克力=原罪?-献给有志减肥者

1已有 8337 次阅读  2009-06-13 01:58
刚写了一篇巧克力的颂歌,这里再转一篇朋友发来的笑话。原文英文,我大略翻译了一下,与热爱巧克力又渴望减肥的难兄难弟,“难姐难妹”共享。

In the beginning...  God populated the earth with broccoli and
cauliflower and spinach, green and yellow and red vegetables of all kinds,so Man and Woman would live long and healthy lives.
Then Satan created Ben and Jerry's and Krispy Creme.  And Satan said, "You want chocolate with that?" And Man and Woman said "Yeah, and another one with sprinkles." And they gained 10 pounds.

在万物起源的时候,上帝让世界上长满了青花椰菜,花椰菜,和菠菜,绿色,黄色,和红色的各种蔬菜,好让男人女人健康长寿。撒旦发明了本杰瑞冰淇淋和脆甜圈。撒旦说:“你们要巧克力口味的吗?”男人女人说:“哦耶,再来一个上面撒了彩色糖粉的。”他们马上增重十磅。

And God created the healthful yogurt that woman might keep the figure that man found so fair. And Satan brought forth white flour from the wheat, and sugar from the cane, and combined them. And woman went from size 3 to size 9. So God said, "Try my fresh green salad." And Satan presented Thousand-Island Dressing and garlic toast on the side. And man and woman had to unfasten their belts.

于是,上帝创造了健康的酸奶好让女人保持男人最爱的苗条身材。撒旦从小麦中提取了白面粉,从甘蔗里提炼出白糖,并把两者混在一起。女人的身材从三号变成了九号。上帝说:“尝尝我的绿色沙拉。”撒旦带来了千岛酱和蒜头面包。男人女人不得不放松他们的裤腰带。

God then said, "I have sent you heart healthy vegetables and olive oil in which to cook them." And Satan brought forth deep fried fish and chicken-fried steak so big It needed its own platter.
Then God brought forth the potato, naturally low in fat and brimming with nutrition. And Satan peeled off the healthful skin and sliced the starchy center into chips and deep-fried them. And man and woman gained another ten pounds.

上帝又说:“我给了你们健康的蔬菜,还给了你们炒菜的橄榄油。”撒旦拿出巨大无比,一块能装一盘的炸鱼块和炸鸡排。上帝又给了大家低脂肪高营养的土豆。撒旦刨掉了土豆健康的表皮,把它充满淀粉的块茎切成条状放在油里炸,男人和女人又增重十磅。

And man gained more weight and his cholesterol went through the roof. God then brought running shoes so that his children might lose those extra pounds. And Satan gave cable TV with a remote control so man would not have to toil changing the channels. And man and woman watched TV and gained more
pounds.

男人体重增加,胆固醇严重超标。上帝带来了跑鞋让他的孩子们减肥。撒旦给了他们有线电视和遥控器,让男人不费吹灰之力就可以换台。于是男人和女人因为看电视又增重十磅。

God then gave lean beef so that man and woman might consume fewer calories and still satisfy their appetite. And Satan created McDonald's and it's 99-cent double cheeseburger. Then said, "You want fries with that?" And man replied, "Yea! And super size 'em." And Satan said "It is good."  And man went into cardiac arrest.

上帝给人类带来了瘦牛肉,让男人和女人减少摄入的卡路里,却仍然能满足自己的胃口。撒旦创造了麦当劳,和九十九美分一个的双层干酪堡,然后问:“还要薯条吗?”男人回答:“哦耶,每样都要超大份!”撒旦说:“太好了!”男人心肌梗塞了。


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发表评论 评论 (6 个评论)

  • Angelia He 2009-06-13 03:10
    好文,谢谢分享。
  • 叶月悠 2009-06-13 03:34
    。。。最近我貌似老在吃垃圾食品来着~
  • 迷路书虫 2009-06-13 10:58
    可见都是撒旦惹的祸, 不关偶的事啊,为什么受苦的总是mememe!!!
  • 夜夜笙歌 2009-06-13 19:00
    calaway: 可见都是撒旦惹的祸, 不关偶的事啊,为什么受苦的总是mememe!!!
    然!
  • 草履虫 2010-12-09 19:24
    好文,棒极了。给屡战屡败的减肥的我找到了借口
  • 夜夜笙歌 2010-12-09 19:29
    windflower1121: 好文,棒极了。给屡战屡败的减肥的我找到了借口
    我的原则是:什么都可以吃,只要适量平衡。
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